FABRIC STUDIES

Thought quilters might relate to this...
A recent study indicated that fabric gives off certain Pheromones that actually hypnotize women and cause them to purchase unreasonable amounts. When stored in large quantities in enclosed spaces, the Pheromones (in the fabric) cause memory loss and induce the nesting syndrome (similar to the one squirrels have before the onset of winter I.e. storing food), therefore perpetuating their species, and not having a population loss due to their kind being cut into pieces and mixed with others. 

Sound tests have also revealed that these fabrics emit a very high-pitched sound, heard only by a select few, a breed of women known as "quilters". When played backwards on an LP, the sounds are heard as chants, "buy me, cut me, and sew me". In order to overcome the so called "feeding frenzy effect" that these fabrics cause, one must wear a face mask when entering a storage facility and use ear plugs to avoid being pulled into their grip. (One must laugh, however, at the sight of customers in a fabric store, with WW2 army gas masks and headphones!). 

Studies have also in dictated that aliens have inhabited the earth, helping to spread the effects that these fabrics have on the human population. They are called FABRIC STORE CLERKS. It's also been experienced that these same Pheromones cause a pathological need to hide these fabric purchases when taken home (or at least blend them into the existing stash), and when asked by significant other if the fabric is new, the reply is "I've had it for awhile."

HOW TO HIDE YOUR FABRIC STASH

HIDING FABRIC

1) Fold it larger and put it evenly under the mattress - you can get a hundred yards under there! 
There's no chance hubby will find it - how often does he make the bed? 

2) You can also fold some and put it under each chair and sofa cushion .

3) Hang a yardage on a coat hanger, then cover it with a piece of clothing - hence, 100 coat 
hangers/100yds of fabric! 3 closets + 300 yards! 

4) Get a large trash can, remove the cover and have someone cut a round piece of plywood out 
for you. Put stash in trash can, put on wooden cover, place a pretty, 70" round tablecloth (or 
sew two 2 yard pieces together lengthwise and "pretend" its a tablecloth on it - a beautiful 
lamp on top - and who's to know it's full of fabric? (A good way to hide the ironing, too!) 

5) If you have a space under the bed, buy some of the flatter Rubbermaid tubs and fill them. 
Now when you've bought more fabric than you can store in these five ways, you just aren't 
sewing enough!!! 

Today is a new day.. and a bad lunch.

Today i started this blog and had lunch at Rallys.. LOVE thier fries so after about a zillion calories and my kid fussing non stop while I munch. I decided to open a blog for our guild and move from The Yahoo group thing.

Please note everything is under construction and i am slowly moving but i hope you guys will enjoy this.

Thanks

Dee